CONFIDENCE

As I was scrolling down my newsfeed at facebook, I saw a post about Miss Universe 2016 candidates being asked about confidence. Unfortunately, I was not able to click that content nor come back to hear their answers.
“What is confidently beautiful for you?”

While I was washing my face. The question came up to my mind. I asked myself, what exactly is “confidently beautiful” for me?

I’m thinking about it until now. This is my answer.

Confidence is very difficult to achieve, but it is a CHOICE.

Confidence is being able to uplift others while uplifting yourself. It is being able to stand up in front of the crowd and think how grateful and amazing you are. On the other hand, you can stay up late at night ALONE and not comparing yourself to others. To what they have, and what you don’t.

Confidence is not just about showing off your bare-face, slim body, flawless skin. It is mostly about appreciating the beauty of a person inside no matter how they are and how you look outside.

It is being able to wake up and sleep at night worry-free.

It is about loving yourself while loving others. 

Maybe you came to my blog because you have a low self-esteem, LIKE ME. Or you just want to know my idea about confidence or maybe you are just passing by.

To tell you honestly, guys, this is a very sensitive topic for me. I know myself as an inspiration to others, posting such positive preaches on my social media so that my followers would somehow be joyful and thankful about life. But I always ask myself, “Am I posting inspirational message for them to be inspired or am I posting it to at least boost my confidence?” 

How it became a sensitive topic? It is because the standard of people, of media.

What it advocates when you say confidence is pretty face, pointed nose, slim body, flawless and light skin. I sometimes think ‘do I have the right to be confident?”

I’m depressed of how I look, I can’t find answers why God would let me feel this.

I struggle about having skin problems. I’ve never had any problem that made me looked down to myself this much. It wrecked me. It destroyed my inner soul and my beliefs about positivity.

I almost lost my faith.

No matter how I choose myself to be confident, situations just would not let me. I always lose. Damage wins.

I will continue this post soon. And tell you how powerful “confidence” is.

Till my next blog,

Jenny <3